Gamer’s Perspective

That’s Marcus and I together online. I intentionally erased my identity.

I have a predictable routine at home. In a time lapse video I would be seen either seated or lying beside Marcus’ white plastic table where he spends almost his whole day playing his favorite online games which are just either Roblox or Minecraft. On some days, we would go shoot the bad guys in Call of Duty. Trust me, he is a sharp shooter, a lot better than me.

Yesterday, while staring at his Roblox game something struck me. That real people are like characters in games such as in this Lego-like environment. Like Marcus’ boxy policeman in patrol, one of the roles he like to play, our perspective in life does control our actions. For example, in the third person perspective, a gamer could see more of everything around him–the whole place, the bad guys, and the good guys alike. With a bigger picture, it makes it easier to decide on the next appropriate actions. Such should be the case when we encounter problems in real life–we should step back, analyze, and form the corresponding solution.

On the other hand, there’s that first person view. This one allows an approach that is focused only on what is directly in front. In games, a lot of movement, from side to side, to turning back, have to be made to ensure that no one sneaks past and take advantage of your current position. This approach is head on and works well if we know what needs to be done. Same goes in real life. We face the issue and deal with it.

There is not one perspective, however, that is perfect. Each requires sound judgment to benefit from it and therefore it is important that one knows when to step back and have a bird’s eye view of the situation; and when to zoom in to be able to engage accordingly. In real life, it takes more than just a mouse control wheel to shift from first person to third person and vice versa. Marcus told me how he does it. It fascinates me that his game would bring me into a short yet deep thought. I can see that when he errs, when he loses, he can respawn, he can restart all over again. Don’t we all wish life is just like this too?

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Mood: 2/10 Honks! (Happy to be home early.)

Goodbye Gym

This week I am due to pay my monthly gym membership fee but I’m passing up on it. I have been thinking about discontinuing my payment since October but the main reason that would make me finally cease from taking that 10-minute walk from home has not happened even until now. This time, however, I have decided to save my P500 whether I like it or not.

It is true that going to the gym is addictive, I can attest to that. Like any other gym rats, I discovered that sense of pride and the accompanying high I get, thanks to endorphins, even just after an hour of intense workout. To conquer that next dumbbell in the row is always rewarding and it progresses to the start of a new goal–heavier weight, you’re next.

Going to the gym was never a thing for me. I hate competing with anyone else, more so tolerate the thought of having to deal with, and the sight of, people who loiter and spend time doing anything but workout–like those excessively staring in the mirror and taking selfies all day. Thankfully, a change in mindset made me overcome this pet peeve. The gym I realized is where my focus is tested, where I compete with myself rather than against the others. But could I still workout if I stop going to the gym?

The only gym pic I ever had.

Questions I have in mind about other options in staying physically fit sans the machines were answered by one of the few books I purchased on Amazon using my almost maxed out credit card.

Strength Rules by Danny Kavadlo provides fresh insights on plain body weight training. It opens new potentials of what anyone could achieve without using any complicated equipment and costly gym membership. Dan’s only requirements are the following: something to step up on, something to hang from, and one that’s readily available, something heavy, which, if you still don’t recognize yet, is our own body.

Danny Kavadlo reminds us that our body is a workout equipment if we know how to use it and how to keep it running. He stresses the importance of natural food over artificial supplements that one I have eliminated sooner (whey protein) and the other I have never bought (creatine). I used to take whey protein regularly but budget and having egg and chicken breast fillet as alternatives—not to mention good sources of natural protein—made me stop buying another 2.2 lbs more of my then favorite workout shake. As Danny says, “Eat muscle to build muscle.” That’s chicken and beef meat. Plain and simple.

There are more things to like about Strength Rules. Danny Kavadlo does not have sets of exercises that he wants to be followed by the number. In fact, he encourages his readers to perform whatever is possible at the moment. He does not believe that a strict routine should be adhered to for one to attain his or her personal fitness goals.

This book is also ideal for those who are tired of fad diets that were neither sustainable nor practical for most.  His take on this? ”Should you have three big meals a day or six small ones? Who cares? Eat when you’re hungry and stop when you’re full. Don’t overthink.” Again, natural foods such as apples and banana only please, so forget about that tempting granola or protein bar as these are not only expensive but full of sugar as well that could negate all the efforts we make to trim down and stay healthy.

Strength Rules is available on Amazon and costs about P400 which I consider a worthy expense. The book has 2100 plus locations with pictures and illustrations that improve comprehension of the variety of exercises that revolve around the basic squat, push, and pull.

Until when I would have my layoff from the gym workout I really can’t tell. Whether it will be temporary or not, remains to be seen as I am looking forward to test myself against plain body weight training. My routine in the next months would change but the main goal why I wake up to go to the gym stays the same: be fit for Marcus, be the muscle for him. Wish me luck.

He wants to see the gym so we dropped by right after his class. Taken a month before he finally said he can’t go to school anymore.

 

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The gym will be one of the very few places I will miss in Dasma.

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Mood: 3/10 Honks! (We’ll have Marcus visit a manghihilot later.)

Gone too Soon

Early part of this year has been full of news of death of celebrities whose names have been all too familiar with me as they have been part of my generation’s pop culture. There’s the iconic singer David Bowie, Glen Frey of Eagles, and the actor who played villain roles, Alan Rickman. I thought everyone in their sixties are dying but today one broke the trend and probably the saddest and tragic so far.

Dave Mirra was found dead and reports tell of an apparent suicide. Mirra who is an icon in the BMX world continued to live the life that others like me could only dream of. At age 41, he is known to have transitioned to be an active triathlete. From the Rad years to his own Playstation game and up to Facebook I was one of those who witnessed his full life, well, until I read the Facebook post on Lad Bible about his untimely death.

Suicide sucks but will always remain a mystery. It is easy to judge those who did it but we will never would understand why, even despite accomplishment and fame, they would rather end their own life. Rest in peace Dave and we pray that God bless your family and kids.

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Mood: 7/10 Honks! (A day of happy and sad news.)

How Do You Explain Anger

At a very young age, kids start to feel and experience a lot of emotions, anger included. When present within their environment, anger could be absorbed by their very innocent minds and it starts to build up ready to be expressed when the right time comes. This we learned recently.

Days after our car got rear-ended by a motorcycle, Marcus asked his mother, “Mommy, why does daddy get angry when driving?” I didn’t ask my wife whether our son used the adverb ‘sometimes’ or ‘always’ to describe the frequency but the news struck me—and I seem to know the answer anyway.  Marcus who has been allowed in the front passenger seat since he turned seven was not only there to enjoy the view but was after all observing my emotions as well.  Driving must be making people angry so for this same reason he does not want to drive in the future anymore.

I have not offered an explanation to our son since I heard about his observation and conclusion regarding my bad driving habits. However, I all of a sudden have a late New Year resolution declared that I should start changing how I drive—at the very least, when he is around—so I could convince him that driving could be a pleasant experience. If he could actually drive soon is another matter.

“Daddy, I won’t be able to drive,” I heard him when I allowed him one day to sit on his own in the driver seat while parked. “I still have short legs, can’t reach the pedals yet,” he added. I smiled and said, “Not now, but soon.” I was suppressing sadness, I was telling him a lie.

Driving will be the least of his worries when Marcus gets older. His dystrophy is taking its toll on his mobility and what was once a simple task of standing and staying still is presently becoming more of a challenge. I can see his frustrations often. Last night, I heard his sentiment myself.

“I am angry at God.” A statement he once told his mother, he said it again immediately after we had our regular night prayer. Like a shot of espresso, such short yet strong statement got me back on my senses away from a progressing sleepy state. Time seems to go slow as my mind processes what it heard while at the same tries to recall every plausible explanation it could get from what I learned in Catholic school and from the homilies in the masses I have attended. How on earth am I going to explain and defend God to this child who regularly prays before he goes to bed?

Well, my wife and I had something. That God has plans for everyone and everything happens for a reason. That to feel angry at his present condition is perfectly normal but he must understand and keep his faith that God does look after him.  It sounds cliché but it was the most rational we can muster at that very moment. We hope that as Marcus grows up and continues to have more questions in life we also strengthen our faith so that  we will have better and convincing answers. Answers that are real, answers that we know aren’t lies.

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No pictures for now, will not waste time waiting for Photobucket to load. We’re getting a passport of Marcus.

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Mood: 2/10 Honks! (Heading to DFA Alabang)

Zen in Car Wash

There was once a time when finding time to wash the car leisurely was no big deal. I can do it anytime, I can do it even every day. But that was then for this activity has taken a backseat among other priorities. When I do get time to do it though, thoughts about the past with it would seem to come by. It’s like there is Zen in squeezing the sponge and applying bubbly car shampoo solution on the car’s cold silver gray surface.

Our car turned eight this year and everything has remained stock just the way I prefer it to be. Last year I was lucky to receive a dashboard cam which is the only significant change that has happened to our Honda City so far. And this month, exactly on its anniversary, we gave it an RFID toll sticker—one that has already helped us breeze through toll gates during our weekly trips to Batangas. Take note, weekly. We have been that busy.

RFID transaction took less than 15 min.

It will be two months since I have been driving almost daily, weekends included. And there have been lots of instances when driving was stressful and judgment fails despite best effort to stay focused. Like recently, a motorcycle rear-ended our car after I tried to overtake a slow moving jeepney. The car had a very minor scratch, the motorcycle rider had a nervous escape, and I had nothing to blame but my sleepy and reckless self. Sometimes bad karma could happen that fast.

I have been wishing to be on a long road trip to break the boring routine trips to the malls, more so, to and from work. This last weekend, that road trip finally happened. The trip to Kamay ni Hesus was nostalgic, the last time I was behind the wheel to Lucena was more than 10 years ago. Not much has changed though except for some completed road improvement as well as perpetual road repairs which give the hint of an incoming election period not to mention the substandard materials that our dear government officials and their contractors love to use.

It was a road trip around Mount Banahaw.

The drive back home was more interesting as we took a different way plus the fact that it was my first time to pass through what drivers refer to as little Baguio or bituka ng manok route.  Named for its undulating and twisty road that resembles the curves of a chicken’s intestine, the route was challenging as expected and every now and then it was tempting to push my driving skill to the limit. It took us almost an hour of twists and turns before we see straight road again. We got out of it intact, no dizzy wifey, Marcus and his cousins didn’t require barf bags.

The last time I washed the car was before New Year and it was also when I had it polished and waxed. I could be that detailed when time and resource allow it. Yesterday, I had the energy to pick up the sponge and bucket once again, thanks to a graveyard shift cut short by two hours, but just to realize that I have ran out of Turtle Wax car shampoo. So for the very first time in my entire life as a car owner I bit the bullet and used a Dove body wash just so our dusty car could have its much deserved break. The bright side? It was the most fragrant car wash it ever had.

Works for humans and cars.

Come to think of it, a car could remind us of how life is. That life will never be perfect, it is never perfect, and if it seems to appear like so, we must accept that it won’t remain perfect forever. There is no point in fretting over minor dents and scratches. As long as the car’s engine keeps running, then so be it. Same goes with life.

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Mood: 3/10 Honks! (Home earlier than yesterday. If I go offline tonight any longer, I might as well work at LTO.)